The trouble is that Mercedes-Benz builds cars which delight all sensible people who think performance is much more than sheer straight line speed. Take the new S500 for example. A luxo-barge to most, yet a performance offering sans parallel to the performance-driven, is also another weapon to provide top-class velocity in a package that is oh-so opulence oriented.

But right now we are right in the middle of rush time traffic on Dubai's Sheikh Zayed Road and we are for once enjoying it. The relentless stop-go gives us the perfect opportunity to let Mercedes-Benzs brand new flagship (well, ok, it was launched at last years Frankfurt Motor Show but it still is the company's most advanced luxury car) show off its capabilities. Performance and sportiness can be read later on in this feature but right now, the big S500 is driving itself!

Well, I am definitely doing my part eyes watching the road and hands gently nudging the steering wheel. But for the last half an hour, my feet havent touched the pedals. The S500 is keeping pace with traffic, slowing, accelerating and even braking to a standstill and then get going again, all on its own. The S-class is the first production automobile in the world to be capable of doing this. And this new technology is called Distronic Plus.

The new S-class represents a significant advance in automotive wizardry and the above mentioned is but one such technological marvel in a car which is a radical departure from the stoic, conservative big Benzes of yesteryears.

Being the first S-class of the new millennium, the new model has to uphold Mercedes-Benz honour and reputation and going by the number of innovations under the well-sculpted skin, it definitely intends to do just that and more!

Styling is much racy than its predecessor with its 17-inch wheels (18- and 19-inch wheels are optionally available) and those prominent flared wheelarches. The back end with its boot and tail light design echo a throwback to Maybach. This is not necessarily a bad thing as it adds character to the car when viewed from the rear. In fact, Mercedes have done a great job giving this lavish automobile a unique and powerful style with a tastefully integrated design that looks good from any angle.  The overall design is substantial and looks like what it is, an expensive luxury car that befits the image of a captain of industry.

Inside is typical Mercedes with swathes of top-grain leather and select wood trim. The steering wheel has a multitude of controls incorporated in it, so the driver can invoke a number of commands without having to take his/her hands off it. Taking of commands, the new S-Class has an improved COMAND system  that is much easier to master with a large display screen in the centre of the dash and a push-and-turn controller, as Mercedes calls it, to control the various features this car has to offer. Similar in operation to BMW's i-drive, it accesses a myriad of features - right from selecting a radio station to setting the navigation plus a whole lot more. A nice touch is the comfy handrest that flips open to reveal a telephone keypad.

In many ways the interior blends old-world charm with modern class and ingenuity. This is best exemplified by the speedometer. While it looks like a conventional dial, in reality it is a TFT display. Flipping the switch to activate the night vision, which Mercedes calls Night View Assist, turns the speedo into a eight-inch display. The speedo can be seen underneath in the form of a sliding ruler.

Unlike Cadillac's passive thermal imaging system, that pick up heat from the road ahead, Night View Assist actually uses two active infra-red beacons projecting beams invisible to the eye which are then seen by a camera mounted in the headliner. The images are then subsequently flashed on the display for the driver's benefit. The system works only with the headlights on and it is a bit of a bother having to divert one's gaze from the road ahead to the screen as it is not in the direct field of view.

The xenon headlamps are brilliant and follow the course of the steering wheel, illuminating the corners more effectively to provide a wider throw of light while negotiating corners. There are many more technological tour-de-forces but since I am running out of space and with the managing editor's dictum of keeping it short ringing loudly in my ears, let's get down to the driving experience.

Ahead of its double-insulated firewall a newly designed 5.5-litre V8 belting out 388 bhp that's good enough for a 5.4 sec sprint to 100kph. This is not a big revving engine and the engine ticks over nicely at low revs with nary a judder or vibration seeping through into the cabin. Now that is expected of a car that is touted as the best luxury car in the world but what really took me by surprise was the way it responded through corners on Al Ain's famed Jebel Hafeet. The intensity to stick to the road was truly a revelation and flinging the big S through corners invoked nary much roll, belaying its massive bulk and girth (not that it is fat by any count). This is thanks to the Active Body Control which has different settings for comfort, Sport and what-have-you.

The air suspension system used on the S Class has a way of soaking up road irregularities as though they aren't there at all. Mercedes has done well in setting up the S with its Airmatic suspension and while the overall plushness of the suspension remains on the softer side, the intelligent system rapidly calculates if the car is being driven sportily to adequately harden up its act and infuse better handling.

Power to the rear wheels is supplied via the excellent 7G-Tronic transmission. This seven-speed gearbox can be shifted via steering wheel buttons and is a cinch to use. Steering is light at first, in typical Mercedes fashion but becomes firmer as speeds rise.

One of the most invigorating and sublime treats served up by the S500 are the absolutely fantastic seats that I have ever experienced in an automobile. Our test car was equipped with the optional Dynamic Multicontour Front Seats, complete with massage. As I mentioned earlier, these seats were the most comfortable automobile seats in the business.

The first thing you notice is that they are adjustable in fourteen ways. In addition to the regular adjustments found on most cars, one can lengthen or shorten the thigh support and move the headrest up or down. But the most endearing part of the front seats is the way the thigh side bolsters squeeze your legs when indulging in a bit of spirited cornering, holding you in place thoroughly.

And yes, the massage function proves invaluable when on long drives. With four settings, there's a different pressure point squeezed in each seating. Heaven! Both the front seats have this feature as Mercedes did not want the front passenger to miss out.

Though the S is a big car, its styling disguises its bulk well. There is enough space on the inside - both for front and rear passengers - to truly revel in it. At the rear, different seating permutations can be carried out, with either space for two or three passengers.

The S-Class is truly a superb automobile and a technological wonder designed to generate looks of desire wherever it goes. With its vast array of gizmos working overtime silently hidden in the vast expanse of sheet metal, it is no wonder then that I regularly took the long way home.